10 Ways to Know Your Aliyah Is Successful

And, in honor of Purim, something fun (and hopefully funny!)

Israeli culture can be difficult to adjust to, but it gets easier with time.  Here are some signs that you are blending in well:

#10. You met your 70-year-old Shabbat host when she shoved you aside in order to get on the empty bus.

#9. Your chain-smoking sherut driver doesn’t stay in the lane, but, Baruch Hashem, he says Tehillim.

#8.  All of your 5 sons carry a gun.  And so does your rabbi.

#7. Your morning commute involves hitchiking.

#6. Your Russian is coming along nicely.

#5. You wear a winter coat and hat when it is 18 degrees C outside.  Sandals, however, are appropriate in any weather, or during any lifecycle event.

#4. You were set up on a shidduch during a job interview.

#3. You have no problem using a storage closet as a dressing room even though it doesn’t have a mirror, or a door. The cab driver idling by the storefront will tell you if the clothes are mat’im.

#2. You have eaten schnitzel for breakfast.

#1. You really begin your grocery shopping once you’ve put your cart in the checkout line.


3 Responses to “10 Ways to Know Your Aliyah Is Successful”

  1. 1 Ann February 28, 2010 at 12:19 pm

    Loved them – you’re obviously settling in very well.

    Here’s another one

    The men mending the roof opposite, when they heard me ‘kvetch’ about the rain “Gveret, zarich le’hagid Baruch Hashem le’kol ha’geshem” – and I’m not even sure they were Jewish !!

  2. 2 Yisroel Meir Reiss March 5, 2010 at 10:26 pm

    Hey Ilene, this was very funny! Good job. It is cool that you have been to South America. I used to live in Costa Rica and Chile. Where have you visited?

    • 3 Ilene March 6, 2010 at 11:09 pm

      Hi Yisroel Meir,
      I lived in Chile for four months in 2004 (yes, everyone I am still in touch with survived the recent ‘quake safe and sound, thank Gd) and went backpacking in Peru, Argentina, and Uruguay in 2008. I’ve really enjoyed what I’ve seen of Latin America .

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Ilene Rosenblum is a writer and marketing professional living in Jerusalem.

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